Thursday, June 30, 2011

Say hello to "Mental Masochsits"

So , for some time now I haven’t been in my “always happy” mood .
( DO not worry..brooms are flying….cauldrons are stirring and all is well again )

So ,I realized that I had ( accidentally ) fallen into the category of people I usually refer to as “mental  masochists “ .

Yes, welcome to 21st century ..blame it on the inflation , or the stressful jobs or on your girl friend . We are ( collectively speaking ) an unhappy lot of people .

I mean to say  ,we see so many people unhappy around us that we tend to IDENTIFY with them .
Somehow seeing ourselves in the same position as them..brings a kind of sense of security.
Don’t you sometimes sit and think ,”WHY am I so happy today ?”
Or “How come nothing’s going wrong till now … ?”

Which brings us to the next stage of human evolution “The Mental Masochists”
( x-men ishtyle )

Now, these people REVEL in misery .
They LOVE the fact that they have problems ( 99% self created ) , love discussing them , moaning over them , regaling them to others and “sharing” their sorrows .
( And you thought Meena Kumari was the only  tragedy queen ? )

They’ll turn molehills into mammoths … put a telescope on their beady tear filled eyes and examine tiny lil’ incidents with such dedication …to try and find a reason to moan .
These are the kind of people noone sticks to for a long times ( in offices …schools …colleges …flights ..toilets ..whatever  ) .
The kind of people you’ll see walking around looking as if their granny didn’t leave them a dime in her will .
The kind that will torture , blackmail , inspect , scrutinize their boyfriends ( or ,in all fairness …their girlfriends ) until the poor chap turns around and lashes out at them …and then ??
(Try remembering the story when Gangaji descended on Earth *sigh* )

Oh , did I forget mentioning imaginary medical complaints , blaming others for not understanding them and taking inspirations from sad Bollywood movies ?
My mistake  ( Is Ekta Kapoor looking for new talent ,by any chance ? )

And if you happen to be in their friend circle ( the kind they’ll come to  and moan about the ‘bedard duniya’ ) , make sure you book an appointment with a psychiatrist and an ent doctor !
Ask them what are you actually DOING to solve your “problem” …. And you are in for suicide ( or at least …the loss of a few precious hair )

SO , the next time something teeny tiny troubles you , make sure you don’t fall into the trap .
Remember Akshay Baba’s words ,
“No problem is big enough once you decide to be HAPPY “ :-D

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

That night in Switzerland...

It was 10pm ( 1.30am IST )
A long plane journey ...bus journey ..all the fun ...the HILARIOUS incidents ...the spell binding beauty ... the strangeness and yet ,the warmth of this unknown place had taken a toll on me .
So far from the my first love ( India ) and yet ... it was so comfortable if this Europe knows no distinction .Everyone was free to walk , look , enjoy , breathe the fresh air and revel in the majestic charm of this age old place !

It was a small town . I don't know the name ...but it's at the base of Mount Titlis . Lots of tourists , the hotels all around , surrounded by icy peaks and pleasant cold breeze . A TOY TOWN !

As I was strolling around all alone , it was drizzling . My hood on my head...nose tip cold . Thinking of the plethora of things I had come across . The UBER cool people , the culture .
And I felt alone ....

Only my steps were echoing in the dark street (lit by tiny lamps ) . No touch .
It was then that I saw a 'mannequin'

In a clothes shop ... some parrot green skirt ...and lit by a single bright lamp over it !

In a second ,it all flashed before me . How we are all like that mannequin . Lit by a light , for how long..I dunno .Hoping to catch someone's eye . HOping to be admired .
Changing our exteriors according to the fashion all around .....
All of us go through the 'nights' ...left alone . All by ourselves .
The day comes again..and the same cycle repeats itself .

One day we'll be taken off the stand and placed in the basement somewhere .
Wearing nothing ... but till then
We are all mannequins .

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Baba Ramdev beats Rakhi Sawant !

I stand up and applaud !
When I saw “rakhi ka swayamvar” I thought I had seen the pinnacle of melodrama .
But no , Babaji had more in store … much more ,infact .

So babaji , what happened to yoga classes ?
Wait..lemme think , the last time I remember you were doing something with Shilpa Shetty , right ?
 ( Or was it Baba Nithyananda ? potato…pateto..same thing )

Someone’s been out of limelight , huh ?
What better chance to light up your disc..oops…yoga floor than to grab on to the hottest issue on the market .Anti corruption dharna !
Babaji … if you really are a ‘sadhu’ shouldn’t you have given up all this ‘moh maya’ already ?
No…ok ! So , ummmm….what about your 1100 crore empire ? does that come under “bhagva” ( saffron ) money ?

What I don’t get is …for a man who preaches yoga , public welfare ( *COUGH* ) and some other bullshit in the name of spirituality ….
How come you know so much about black money and income tax and laws ( and what is the world was that ‘teaching in regional languages’ all about ? )

And taking I-dunno-how-many followers on a fast with you ?
If you really have the power to influence them , why don’t you tell them not to support corruption in the first place  ???
Why ? why do you need to make such a scene out of it ?

Many will say “Whatever it is .. he’s doing it for a good cause ! “
Yes , and in that process …he has done this too ….

And instead heating up the ‘breaking news’ with his cheap antics …

As it is , the media and the public are as fickle as it comes .
Tomorrow if Vijay Mallya sits on a dharna ,they’ll follow him too !

But bravo babaji …
Tired of churning your stomach and your saffron money …. I daresay the time is right to go invent “politica-asan” !

( thanks to ms.Sanya , the P friend )