Tuesday, December 1, 2009

"TWILIGHT" .....ripped apart for you

OK…I plead guilty . I have read only the first book ( if it hadn’t been for the headache it gave me…MAYBE I could have gone further )

I grew up with Bram Stoker and Anne rice people ….vampires , mansions , the cloaks , the opening of the coffins , the sheer romance and elegance of the evil .
So , forgive me ….i find it a BIT DIFFICULT to accept these “new age vampies” . Chikne little twinks roaming aorund the streets …sucking rabbits and bears and I dunno what else … falling in love with skinny anemic high school girls and driving high speed cars … ! It kind of damages the entire “vampire” aura .

They live in open air highly ventillated houses ( YIKES ! allergic to wooden coffins people ? ) …feed on animal blood ( turned veggie , huh ? )… wear jerseys and sweat-shirts and high necked sweaters ( she could have put in sherwani too … wouls have added on to the IMAGE ) …and listen to their girl friends talking in sleep ( FOR CHRIST’S SAKE …are you a vampire or a voyeur ? ) . Next thing you know , they’ll open up a chain of fast-food-blood-banks !
To add up to it …they get the humnas pregnant too ( Wo baby ! and we are still meddling around with genetic engineering ) …somehow werewolves also creep in and the entire palce starts resembling DISNEY LAND ( I wonder if someone will transorm into RAKHI SAWANT also …that should add to the scary quotient) .

The end result …the book is a scary/tragedy/love/fantasy …all rolled into one .

OK …we can stil tolerate that PROVIDED the girls can be a BIT quiet ...
“Edward Cullen ….aaaaaaaaaa”

OMG …Edward Cullen wallpapers , pillows , t-shirts …grrrrrrr .

They are putting us Harry Potter fans to shame I think . Well ….Carry on . The only problem is , if they get too much carried away BOYS will have a very HIGH STANDARD to compete with ( start sharpening your teeth.....ummm your abillities )

ADVICE ...1. next time you meet your girl-friend try kissing her on the neck first…that will excite her faster
2.Don’t ask “What’s your sun sign or favourite movie or hobbies ?” . Just go on straight away to “What’s you blood group ?” …They’ll fall in for you more easily !


  1. cool rip off.. lacked ur true sense of convoluted sarcasm.. but gud none the less...
    n FYI i lyked the twilight series... now go figure...

  2. I love edward cullen and the twilight series, just like harry potter.. !!

    ques, how do u know about the werewolves and preganant stuff, when you have not read the other parts?? :-P

  3. omg ... You reached this article ? :D

    Lol ,my sister was kind enough to "update" me on th story ( ties a noose around his neck )

    And this was my first article ..kind of amateurish :P